Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Getting on out there...

I don't think that the tone of my next few comments are to be blamed on pregnancy hormones.   

Let's address a few of the most common questions you receive as a growing pregnant lady.

1.  Are you going to breastfeed?
2.  Are you going to have the baby naturally?
3.  Are you going back to work after the baby is born?

Here are my thoughts.  Why do people ask these questions?  Are they not extraordinarily personal questions?  I think that people only ask these questions when they have an opinion about the answers or they want their own personal decision to be validated. 

I have, to this point, been able to answer with some measure of restraint, but part of me wants to say, "What do you mean, naturally?"  I'm not planning one her being delivered by some foreign, unknown method, no.  I really only know of two options for her entry and they both seem perfectly natural.  Now, if you are trying to ask about pain medication, one, just ask--don't try to hide your motive.  And again, so far, I have not given the reply, "I plan on using medicinal marijuana."  As the term progresses though, I cannot make any promises on what might come out of my mouth.

I'm not sure why people are so opinionated about any of this.  THERE ARE NO BAD DECISIONS CONCERNING .  Breastfed/formula, medicated/non-medicated, working/not working--all these are valid, feasible, and do not condemn any child to a horrible life or fate.  It's just not worth (in the words of my mom) getting your panties in a wad about.  I think the stress that is injected into these conversations are much more damaging than anything else. 

Please, let's not place undue stress on any parent.  Don't try to scare, don't tell worse-case scenario delivery horror stories.  If you've had one, seek help by talking out that experience with a professional.  (That may have been a hormone-induced sentence, forgive me.)  Don't have an unnecessary, unhelpful opinion.  Give tips, give suggestions, bring over a casserole.  Those are much more healthy approaches under the "It Takes a Village" title. 

Let's concentrate on health and on love.  Simply nothing else matters.  Babies will come out, they will be fed, they will be reared.  They all will be unique creatures--let's sit in awe and amazement over that fact.